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Understanding Matrescence: The Birth of a Mother

We spend nine months preparing for a new addition to the family.  We paint nurseries, attend classes on birth and infant sleep, host a  baby shower/nappy party, and we buy tiny clothes. But as the baby is born, someone else is born, too: The Mother.


If you have ever felt overwhelmed, confused, lost, or like a stranger in your own life, there is a word for what you are experiencing. It isn’t a "disorder" or a "failure." It is called Matrescence.



What is Matrescence?


Matrescence is a developmental process that we go through before we become mothers (or caregiver in a mothering-role), and it continues throughout motherhood/caregiving. This process is continuous and involves a vast amount of transitions/changes in all aspects of our lives. 


Like adolescence, we experience changes in all different aspects of our being, this includes biology, psychology, spiritually, and socially. It’s a complex process, and an opportunity to grow as an individual and transform into the best version of our true self. 


The process/ transitions/ changes that we experience in motherhood is not linear and it is far more complex than just “facing” the experiences of change/new situations. There is no real start and end point for changes we experience, because each time we experience a change (even those very similar to each other), our ability to cope, our skills, beliefs, and knowledge in that particular moment will determine how we experience and how we navigate that experience. Therefore, Matrescence is a lifelong process.


It is also a season of "both/and" - better known as maternal ambivalence:


  • You can be deeply in love with your child and miss your old self.

  • You can be grateful for your body and feel disconnected from it.

  • You can be surrounded by people and feel completely alone in your thoughts.


You are not losing yourself; you are becoming a new and evolved version of yourself.



How a Matrescence Practitioner Helps You Navigate This Season


You might be wondering what it actually looks like to work with someone during your Matrescence journey. The role of a practitioner is to help you navigate the unique challenges and experiences that come with your specific journey.


Think of a practitioner as a guide for the transition. I am here to help you:


  • Navigate the Identity Shift: 

We work together to bridge the gap between who you were before and who you are becoming, helping you feel like an even more authentic version of yourself within your new role as a mother/caregiver.


  • Navigate the Mental Load: 

We identify the challenges of daily life and decision-making, uncovering the root causes for your experiecne, and providing you with tools to manage the internal noise and find clarity that aligns with your values.


  • Navigate Physical Change: 

Through empowered movement and yoga, I help you navigate the experience of being in your before and body after birth, moving away from "fixing" and toward "feeling".


  • Navigate Your Internal Narrative: 

We look at how you are experiencing the shifts in motherhood, so you can understand where your thoughts and feelings come from. Together we navigate challenges while building on your sense of self and empower you to face future changes with even more confidence.


By learning to navigate your own experiences with intention, you move from feeling like you are "treading water" to feeling like you are steering your own ship.


Practitioner takes notes while listening to a mother in a cozy beige counseling office, calm and supportive environment. Maternal mental wellbeing

A Gentle Check-In


As mothers, our natural instinct is to pour every ounce of energy into our children. But you are the environment your child lives in. Investing in your own mental and physical well-being isn't a luxury; it's a foundation.

Reflect on these questions honestly. If you find yourself nodding along to three or more, you may find it helpful to have support as you navigate this transition:


  1. The Identity Gap: 

Do you feel like you are "performing" the role of a mother but have lost touch with who you are as an individual?


  1. The Comparison Trap: 

Do you frequently compare your "behind-the-scenes" struggles to everyone else's "highlight reel," leading to feelings of inadequacy?


  1. Physical Disconnection: 

Does your body feel like a stranger to you? Are you looking to move in a way that feels empowering rather than just "rehabilitative"?


  1. The Mental Load: 

Does the weight of decision-making feel heavy, and are you looking for tools to reframe your internal narrative?


  1. Desire for Community: 

Do you crave a space where your "whole self", not just your "parent self", is seen and supported?


A Note to the Mother Who Feels She Can’t Reach Out


If you are reading this and thinking, "I need this, but I can't afford a practitioner right now," please hear this: You are not alone, and you are not invisible.


The transition of Matrescence belongs to every mother. While professional coaching and movement sessions are valuable tools, the most important step is simply breaking the silence.


If you are struggling to navigate this season, please reach out anyway. Whether it’s to find community resources, low-cost support options, or just to have your experience validated, the door is always open. You don't have to do this in isolation.


Resources to Help You Navigate


If you would like to learn more about how you can be supported, email alicia@empoweredauthenticity.com


Disclosure: Although I have provided the framework, and the information for this blog, and edited it myself, research assistance was provided by Google AI


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